We’re living in a throwback to 2008, when Crocs were “in.” The recent revival of the rubber clogs has the high school world up in arms. The Croc controversy is possibly second only to the Birkenstock craze, and we feel personally offended by high school student’s insistence on the resurrection of the long-dead trend.

Jibbitz “shoe charms” only make matters worse- Crocs.com advertises them as a “wide variety of rhinestone embellishments & popular characters!” Like fml kms help.

There’s a rumor that Crocs are actually edible, just in case the poor soul who decided to wear them is also unfortunate enough to get lost in the wilderness, alone, with no food or hope of rescue.
In short, the only thing crocs are good for is social isolationism, and possibly a five-star meal when you’re stranded in the outback.